There are so many feelings around the world which in some
many levels can change your life; there are good feelings, bad feelings,
unknown feelings, wonderful feelings and unexplicable feelings but there is not
an accurate position in which you can put love; because love is a feeling that
can be in all the categories above. Love itself is the feeling that changes
your life the most; actually love is the
first feeling that every human being feels and love is the feeling which move
your world upside down not just once, otherwise again and again.
But, why this feeling can be in all the categories? The
answer is easy and totally expected, love is a changing feeling. Sometimes it
could be so good because you feel like there is no one in the world who can
move your life in the way in which that person does; sometimes it could be bad
because you just made a mistake when you were chosing; sometimes it could be
unknown because you’re feeling it but you don’t understand it; sometimes it
could be wonderful because there’s no other feeling which can put you to fly in
a cloud and most of the time this feeling is totally unexplicable and
irracional because you can’t answer when someone asks you why you feel the way
you feel.
However love is the kind of feeling that doesn’t come alone,
love is always surrounded by hundreds of feelings; one of them and the most
important one is the selfless. it’s true
that you should put yourself in the first place in your life; it’s true that
you can’t be tied to someone else just because is the best for him or her; it’s
true that you should think what is best for you but also it’s true that when
you love, his happinness becomes yours, his tears come from your eyes and his
pain is felt in the deepest part of your heart. Why? Because love is like that….and
if love is like that the only thing that you can do when you are in love is to
avoid at all costs the pain, the tears, the fear and the sad faces to your
loved one.
Then we begin to ask ourselves
who we used to be before we felt in love; perhaps we used to be those kind of
happy people who were always smiling, perhaps we used to be those kind who were
always alone; perhaps we used to be those always angry and negative; perhaps we
didn’t know who we used to be but abruptly we lost evertything in a pair of
eyes which are glazing at you as you had met them before in a life which used
to be yours but it’s not anymore; abruptly you decide that a smile can shine
your life even if you are living in the middle of the darkest desert; abruptly
you understand that his pain is hurting you as a knife in your chest; abruptly
you find yourself entranced in some kind of spell that you didn’t know before; abruptly
you realize that every single word makes perfect sense; abruptly you think that
there’s no other life that you want to live than this one that you are living; abruptly
you let yourself know that everthing that you used to know is about to change
forever.
But one day and without any warning all your world is
falling apart; all you knew as your life for a while is not anymore; all you
used to be, to think and to feel, isn’t clear at all; all about who you are is
a complete mess of broken pieces. Who I am? Who I want to be? Who I used to be?
Do I like who I am now? Do I want to go back on time? Can I recover all the
pieces of my broken heart? Can I stick them? Can I be who I used to be? Could I
find my smile?....your mind is now an ocean of questions without answer; your
heart is a puzzle without shapes; your smile is lost in some place in the
middle of that sea of feelings; your tears finally find their way to going out;
and your answers are hidden behind some clouds inside the sky of your head but
your scence is still there and who you are is the same person who you used to
be.
There will be always a before and after; there will be always a you and me; there will be always
an us somewhere; there will be always a road we already traveled; a
chapter we already wrote; a book we already read and a movie we
already stared; there will be always a story to tell about what we used to be,
what we used to think or what we used to like; there will be always an I’m
sorry that we never said or we said to late; there will be always a kiss that
we never give, a final hug that we miss a lot and a caress that we will miss
forever; there will be always a hidden I love you; there will be always a light
in the end of the tunnel; there will be always a smile to share; there will be
always a path to follow and without any doubt there will be always a new begining.
Nevertheless we will miss who we used to be before and with
that person; nevertheless we are lost right now; nevertheless we are craving
something that we used to have; nevertheless we want to stop right now;
nevertheless there will always be a me before you.
To you….
